Inglesh iz ard too espeek!

I haven't really posted anything about the fantastic and wonderful world of English linguistics yet. As you may have noticed, I have found a few really fun linguistic websites and collected them on my side bar with the rest of my blogs. Here are a few funny pictures I found online. Enjoy!

Play sports or hobbits...I'm too tall, it wouldn't work for me...


AHHHH!!! They're EVERYWHERE!!


Uh....? Sully? Maybe for Sully in Monster's Inc.!


Treasure the use...need I say more?


Only on the digestive track.


Really?? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!


Oh...that does not look good...


Could you get my toenails while you're at it?


Yes, avoid gnashing head on rocks...


I have got to get me one of these!


How many times can we use different cases of 'smoke' in one sentence?



Do you mean, Thank you for coming??


And this is why I am an English teacher...


Yikes! Stay out of that park!


Finally! They have a place for them!! Food for all now!!


Yuck.

Do not despise small beginnings...

This past weekend, I battled to keep the lies out. Lies that said, "You mooch", "How could you live with them this long?", "You don't belong here" or "They don't enjoy having you here anymore" -- nothing but LIES from the enemy. It is evident in how great the relationships are, what God has done in both parties, and His peace in my heart that I am supposed to be with them. On Sunday night, I met with a friend who mentioned briefly the verse from Zechariah that I don't believe I've ever heard before (as a verse anyway!). I looked it up online and was blessed by its relevance for me during this time. Once I read it, I thought Accept His gifts and His provision. Trust that you are where He wants you. Look at all the things He has done for you, Mary! God has been so good to you! So here is the verse:

"Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin..." (Zechariah 4:10)

When I was looking up this verse, I found a precious blog that I would like to share with you. This blog is kept by a young mom who also found comfort in this verse from Zechariah. Feel free to take a look: http://www.noordinarymomentsblog.com/2008/04/do-not-despise-these-small-beginnings.html

"...for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin..." -- How powerful to know and believe that this time in my life is something that makes Him rejoice! He gets excited because the work I am doing is truly beginning! Even though the initial training is over (for college), there will be many lessons continuing in the School of God (as my Granny Fall would say). My 'small beginnings' have been varied: living with a couple from my church and renting out their daughter's old bedroom, substitute teaching, making good contacts & starting to network, having just enough money for bills & minor expenses (like gas, etc.)...the list goes on. On Sunday I finally burst, but Dad simply said -"just one day at a time." To know that God doesn't despise this time in my life -- that the meager tasks I am completing on a daily basis do have purpose and the people I am influencing as a sub need me in their lives for however short a time -- He doesn't despise in, but REJOICES in. I believe that He rejoices in his daughter as I faithfully take on each task with peace, not with a despairing heart, but choosing to trust that He will provide and guide. As they say (whoever 'they' are)--"You've gotta start somewhere, right?"

Lord, I want to have that quiet, trusting heart. To take on each duty, each day - and to give my best regardless of the type or level of each task. Lord, help me to rejoice with you in these small beginnings. And may I pray, like my friend did on Sunday night, that you would bless me so that I can bless others. Father, I want to be what you want me to be. Help me to not miss any moments you have for me -- moments to be obedient, moments to meditate on you and your truth, moments to be active and moments to wait. Help me to live today as you desire for me to live. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. Help me to live in that freedom as I walk with you, obeying and trusting you. I ask all of these things in the name of Jesus. And Holy Spirit, for whatever I cannot aritculate through human words, groan for me, intercede for me, and please pour your grace on. I think of these students. Walking corpses, some of them are. Clothed in your Righteousness, some of them are. All, you love. All, you desire. Please help them to come to know you as their personal savior. Amen.


Ooo! P.S.~ Right before that verse, an angel says to Zechariah, "So he said to me, "This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty." -- So, only through God do these small beginnings have purpose and only through His Spirit can I walk with Him each day, accomplishing what He wants accomplished!

Personal Retreat

I need a personal retreat.

During the last few days, I've really hungered for a personal retreat. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and the people that are in my life. But...sometimes, you just need to be alone to process, rethink things, be refreshed. Am I right? Well, the week subbing ended okay. After classes on Saturday, I stayed at the office and got organized and finished paperwork. I then remembered that a woman at my church had given me an invitation for a special worship service they were doing on Saturday night from 5-7 p.m. What was neat about this worship service was that you could come and go as you please, worship through song or artwork, journal, rest, pray, etc. It was wonderful. I arrived an hour late and by the time it ended I thought, Really? It's over already?

I need a personal retreat with God.

Today after church I met a friend for lunch and then decided to go to downtown Noblesville to a coffee shop. I brought my Bible, a good book, and two of my journals -- ready to regroup. I ended up calling my dad and sister and all of the emotions and elements of the future that are unsure just came rushing out through tears. I love them. They were such great listeners. They didn't act like they knew everything. They didn't try to conquer the conversation with all of their "experience." Dad just simply said, "Just one step at a time" and with that, peace. After a while, the conversation changed and my eyes dried; Kristen and I chatted for three hours! I am noticing her changing more and more. She is such a beautiful person, and the result of pain is making her more and more beautiful. It was GREAT to talk to her. I parked my car and walked around the quaint little town, describing the old brick buildings and little shops, sipping my coffee, reading the historical markers on some of the older buildings. My younger sister joined our conversation, too, and the three of us had such a blast chatting together. I cannot tell you how much I miss them. Even though I had a great time walking around and catching up with my sisters, I didn't leave feeling inwardly, personally renewed.

When I think about being refreshed, I usually see myself in a serene setting first-- whether it is outside underneath a tree during the summer months, in a window seat with a great book during a rainstorm, in my grandmother's spare bedroom, or in a bathtub of bubbles surrounded by vanilla candles. You may picture a spa in the mountains, a cozy nap on the couch, a walk in the woods...All of those pictures are great and believe me, I've had lots of outdoor walks and returned feeling completely refreshed. However, those alone are incomplete pictures of what being refreshed looks like. They are missing something. If God isn't present -- no, if God isn't communed with...then I usually don't leave being refreshed. The place is just the whipped cream, the topping, the desert. But being with God, communing with Him, seeking what He wants, listening and obeying...that is the main course.

Through both of these experiences, I felt like the settings were perfect, but I didn't fully get what my heart needed. And even though I was able to sleep in this morning because we didn't have worship or choir practice, the extra sleep refreshes my body -- but my heart still needs to be refreshed. When I was in China (this exact time last year), I remember being miserable and anxious because of the circumstances. Now that I reflect back on those experiences, I remember God bringing me various pictures throughout the day that brought me such sweet peace. Memories of being with my cousin, Valerie, in Mesick and Frankfurt. Pictures of friends, family, our farm, times of comfort, my dad. God also brought me several of my favorite movie soundtracks that also helped me to remember the times of peace before. So, pictures and music are indeed important. God sometimes brings pictures to our minds to remind us of His goodness and instances in the past where He has come through and shown Himself faithful. The pictures themselves without God don't do anything -- but they had significance because God gave them significance! The only true refreshment I can find will be in the presence of God.

I still need a personal retreat with God. I know it is coming soon. While I wait, I will be faithful.

Much love to you, my Readers...

"Pick me up, Daddy!"

Last night at choir practice, the music director read a chapter from a book on worship during our devotions. The author painted a very real picture for me with one of his illustrations. {I have embellished some parts to this picture so that you could see what I saw!} Imagine a father and little three or four year old child getting into an elevator. With each new floor stop, more and more people try to cram into the increasingly heavy box, hoping to get to their meetings and work within minutes. With every new passenger, the little child clings to her Daddy's hand more, shifting with him as each new passenger comes with their own unique shape and style, luggage and disposition. Pretty soon, there is barely enough room to blink and what is resting at eye level for the little four year old is nothing but belt buckels, purses and bags, and an ever-swinging elbow that barely grazes her scalp. There is just enough space to see the red "stop" at the bottom of the other floor buttons. How the little four year old wishes she could reach through the trafficking legs and bodies, pressing the stop and open buttons, pushing all the others out to leave her with alone with her Daddy and peaceful space. She looks up among all the heads of people -- tumbling curls hanging above her, a hat shifting the shadows from the lights above, a man with a hairy nose, and finally -- her Daddy -- still holding her hand and looking confidently at the lit up floor number resting on the half-circle in which they are to exit from. Reaching up with outstretched arms and fingers, the child says with desperation, "Daddy, please! Pick me up, Daddy!" -- and something in my heart resonated with something in that little child's heart.

Father, I need a new perspective on this job-hunting thing. And with the future. I feel like I am that little child -- and all I see are belt buckles and purses and the ever-swinging elbow of finances coming back and forth at me. God, I know you will provide and I believe you will provide. Please help me to keep my mind from all the things that are temporary (those things that will exit the elevator) and from the things that Satan wants me to speculate about and doubt about. God, help me to work hard, trust you, and wait patiently. Please give me peace about the future. As I did the dishes the other day, You spoke so personally and genuinely to my heart, saying that you would never leave me without provision. Father, I am calling out and seeking your face above the things of this world -- draw me close to you. Pick me up so that I can have a new perspective on things. I worship you, Lord. You have a purpose and a plan for our lives, and you will not abandon us! I pray all of these things in the power of Jesus' name with confidence and faith. Amen.

Dear Readers, I am anticipating God's hand! I can't wait to share another, "IT JUST SO HAPPENS..." story with you! Please pray that God would continue to show up in miraculous ways and show me what He wants for me. I trust him! Please pray that God would show me the things I need to do to get a full-time teaching job here. I know He will provide -- I believe that it is just a matter of time!

Waiting, waiting, waiting

I am not waiting idlely. I am praying. And everyday, I am desiring a job as an ESL teacher more and more. As I work with the students here at LC and LN, God has allowed me to teach, practice management, and develop a growing rapport with these students. I walk away feeling refreshed. I love being with these students even when I have to step up and manage or discipline. There is just a sense of peace that I am where I am supposed to be.

Please pray for me. I've heard so many things about hundreds and thousands of teachers being let go, yet so many teachers I have talked to say that I shouldn't have a problem getting a job because of the great need for ESL teachers and because my license is K-12. With these dueling sides, I am praying for that special classroom that I am meant to be in. Please pray that God would provide and reveal these things to me. I know He is preparing me right now for it. I wish I could just start working in one of the high schools that I am at right now. I have already started building relationships with the kids and I know a lot of the staff, which I've also started buidling good rapport with. It would seem natural to me to transition into a teaching position at one of these places. But God knows.

Thank you, dear Readers.

He Alone Can Rescue...

Today, I sang the solo at church and God really did help. I praise God that He is allowing me to learn the lesson of taking care of this gift especially now before our Easter program when I still have time to practice, practice, practice. I always wanted to sing in church or use my voice for something, but as a teenager, it just never worked out. And, I think that was on purpose. My relationship with God wasn't as authentic as it is now. Now, when I sing it means so much more. Even on Sunday morning as we practiced, I remembered what a friend once said to me when I was asked to sing at a wedding and couldn't sing well because of a sore throat. "Make a joyful noise to the Lord, Mary Sue." And, I did! Even though my part wasn't that great, I was worshipping! I want that for the Easter program. It will be my first, ever, where I am part of the program.

This lesson of learning to take care of my gifts and use them as an offering has been good, but not easy for me. I really took it seriously when our choir director told us one rehearsal that there were two things that Trinity valued for us: musical excellence and spiritual excellence. And I fell short. BUT GOD IS GOOD. I wasn't sure how our choir director would take me missing a four-hour practice because of teaching this past Saturday, but he was very gracious. Between Wednesday and Saturday, I was upset at myself for not emailing him or letting him know sooner. So, lessons in diligence as a whole have been part of the curriculum in, as my wonderful Grandma Fall would say, "the School of God". I take comfort in her words because "He trusts you, Mary Sue!" as she has often told me. Praise God for an amazing mentor, friend and parent in my life as Grandma Fall.

When God gives you a gift, it is then your responsibility to get curious, rattle the box a bit, open it, investigate it, experiment with it to find it's best use, practice using it with it's best use, and then USE it! For me, the lesson was to first be willing to use it for Him, to keep practicing, to keep my heart focused on Him, then to USE it for HIS GLORY.

Just some thoughts for you...goodnight, friends!

Update on Substitute Teaching

Alright, so here is my update on subbing. I have been trying to think of a particular experience that stuck out as a "God Moment", but honestly, I am having them all the time. Whether it is just talking to the students or correcting them, laughing with them or helping them to finish the assignments, I feel like God has just been loving them through me. Or maybe it is just His peace that I am enjoying so much lately -- His peace that this is where I am supposed to be. Thank you, Lord! Teaching really is an awesome opportunity because I see sooo many kids in a day! Even though subbing is NOT teaching, I feel like I am making good connections and helping kids, even if it is only for 90 mns a day. Also, I've met a lot of great staff and teachers who really care about what they're doing. It's exciting when teachers realize that I am a teacher and can teach their lessons. I love that. About two weeks ago, I subbed for students taking a test in a math class. Towards the end of the class, this girl came up and I invited her to just sit and chat with me for a while. What a wonderfully-made creation blessed with such drive and potential! We had a great talk about college, the future, and what to do with passions that we just "have". I saw her earlier this week which was a treat and then I had her again in class this morning. We chatted a bit after class and she had no idea that she needed to fill out a FAFSA form for college next year! I hope it is not too late! Please pray for this special girl. I will call her *JaMia in my entries, should I mention her again. I remember asking God a month ago when I first started this to give me just one student that I could maybe get to know well and mentor a bit, if God feels like I am in a good place to mentor someone else. Well, who knows what will happen?

As I have met and worked for many teachers, I've been able to share where I'm from and what my degree and certification is in. Several of the teachers I've talked to have said in reply to my K-12 ESL degree/license that "oh! you should be set! you'll be just fine for a job!" -- to which I am hoping and praying for. I know that I am where God wants me for right now and I know that it will not be all rosy when I do get that position as a teacher...so, I am trying to remember that He is and will prepare me for that position, that He can see ahead of time all of the struggles and situations I will encounter, and that He knows when the right timing is. Even though I really want it, I've got to trust for that just-right position for me and that just-right timing. I hope that soon I will be able to post another entry entitled, "IT JUST SO HAPPENS...that I GOT A JOB, PRAISE GOD!"

God, help me to wait on you, Lord. Please provide a full-time ESL teaching position at the right time and in the right place, and help me to trust you for it. Thank you for your precious love. I love you, God.

I couldn't do any of this without God's grace and strength. He speaks through me because he delights in them; I'm just a vessel. I am so thankful for His grace, dear friends! I couldn't love or listen or encounter each student with grace if it wasn't for His great love and grace. I am not worthy. He is worthy!

You Alone Can Rescue

I don't know how many of you readers have heard the song by Matt Redman called, "You Alone Can Rescue", but the lyrics are really powerful. For our church choir I was asked to take the solo, which is actually a male tenor solo. Initially, I was excited and validated - God was using my talents and wanted to continue to use them. However, over the past few weeks, I have mindlessly neglected my music. My biggest pet peeve about myself is that. The things that I know I should do and need to do, but I don't do them because at the time I may not see the immediate need for my attention to a certain matter. Can anyone say procrastinate? ARG, I hate it. I hate when I procrastinate.

Back to the song...last night after choir, I was discouraged about the song and my lack of time spent on it. Even though people in choir said that it sounded good, it wasn't where I wanted it to be and I could tell certain people were disappointed. God has given me this opportunity to share and lead and for Him to use me, and I haven't been doing my part. I ended the night discouraged and woke up this morning with that same sense. As I was leaving, however, I began to think of the meaning behind the song. How should I prepare myself for this song? By praising Him for the time I do have before Sunday. By understanding the meaning. I look at the words and I know that it is my story of how God found and saved me. Even more, "You alone can rescue" has so much relevance for the everyday challenges that I've been encountering.

Lately, I've been hearing various world views at work like people believing that the Bible is just a bunch of stories to help us be better. On a t.v. program I watched last night, this man gave his son an inspirational picture of a tree that said, "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger". It's like this constant effort of most people to find morals and good lessons outside of the gospel and God's word. It is like skim milk. Watered down yuck. {just an illustration, I like skim}

How about the show Guliana and Bill? I watched it the other night and was close to being sick because of how petty they were being. Any little stress they had or problem would be solved by money. They would come up with this extravagant plan (like going on an expensive couples retreat challenge week)to forget that they had stress or issues (like everyone else). It made me kind of sick -- one of the comments that the main actress reacted with was "Oooh, I need a gift" -- after her husband administered a shot to her (like a fertility shot) that caused a very small amount of pain (and all of her fears are usually treated this way, with pampering). In that same show, Guliana and Bill fly to an expensive resort in Arizona (they live in Chicago) for a couples retreat because they are stressed out due to infertility. The couples (their friends) all experience competitive tension because it is a challenge retreat where they are competing for a heavy golden cup. They end up going to this ranch which is part of the resort, where this horse whisperer/psychologist tries to judge what their fears are based on whether or not they can pick up the horse's hoof. If they can't move it, that means they are struggling with a fear or jealousy or anger. It seemed like this guy just pulled these things out of the sky! Okay, so you didn't pick up the horse's hoof. Why have you been treating your husband like he is unworthy of you lately? WHAT?! They are trying to figure out and solve their problems by meaningless things. By the end of this exercise with the horse whisperer person, they had all cried and bonded. Seriously, I am not trying to be cynical -- this exercise was just ridiculous! My cousin and I were laughing the whole time. What would happen to them if they went bankrupt or lost their jobs? I mean, sure, it's nice to get away when you are stressed, but on this show it seems like such a cop-out.

People are so hungry and are looking in all the wrong places! Or better yet, think of the ways that people try to earn their salvation or measure up to God's standards without knowing Him or being forgiven by Him. "You Alone Can Rescue" really resonates with me because of that; Only GOD can save me from this world and myself, my sinful and unworthy self. I am so full of flaws. Please pray for Sunday, for our time of worship, for my heart. I want to be a living testimony through this, whether I do great or terribly. Sure, I can learn the lyrics and the notes, but without really connecting to the truth of this song, it will not be more than just a song. I want to worship Him. Please feel free to post any scripture or personal testimonies that relate to this song. Love you guys.

Here are the lyrics:

YOU ALONE CAN RESCUE, Matt Redman

Who, oh Lord, could save themselves,
Their own soul could heal?
Our shame was deeper than the sea
Your grace is deeper still
(Repeat 1x)

You alone can rescue, You alone can save
You alone can lift us from the grave
You came down to find us, led us out of death
To You alone belongs the highest praise

You, oh Lord, have made a way
The great divide You heal
For when our hearts were far away
Your love went further still
Yes, your love goes further still

You alone can rescue, You alone can save
You alone can lift us from the grave
You came down to find us, led us out of death
To You alone belongs the highest praise
(Repeat 2x)

You alone

We lift up our eyes, lift up our eyes
You’re the Giver of Life
(Repeat 7x)

You alone can rescue, You alone can save
You alone can lift us from the grave
You came down to find us, led us out of death
To You alone belongs the highest praise
(Repeat 2x)

To You alone

AHH! IT JUST SO HAPPENS, AGAIN!

Okay, so I am really excited to write ANOTHER entry about God's magnificent care over me! IT JUST SO HAPPENS that this week I have been such a feather-brained creature and have locked myself OUT of my car...twice. I know, Stupid, right? Well, the first time wasn't so bad because I was just in the driveway outside my house and could run upstairs to get the spare -- spair? -- key and unlock it. YESTERDAY, however, I was at school, about 10-15 minutes away from my spare -- spair? (sp, please!)-- other key and had NO way of getting to it. No one from home was answering their phone and I don't have AAA. So...I stopped a cop, who didn't have the tools. I waited for a security guard from the school, who wasn't allowed to help because of liability with the electric. I finally got a hold of another security guard who said he could do it because he was technically off duty and it would be a personal favor, but he couldn't seem to get in the car. THEN, a man in a white van with a sign on the top that read "1-800-POP-UP" (or Pop Out, or something like that) pulls up and asks if we need help. Stunned, I asked, "Did someone call him?...uh, Did someone call you?" -- to which he replied, "No, I was just in the area" -- WOW! So, HE JUST HAPPENED to be in the area and that JUST HAPPENED to be his profession - road side help -- when I got locked out of my car and have no way to my spare/spair/other key -- man, I really need to look up the correct spelling before it kills me...

So, yay! There's my most recent account of God's provision. The man wouldn't let me pay him either. Wow. I asked for a business card and hopefully, I can send him something later or at least ask for a chunk of his business cards to help him advertise.

Well, It Just So Happens...

If I had to entitle the season of life I am in right now like the title of a chapter in a book, I'd have to call this one "It Just So Happens." There have been several exciting things take place over the last two months since I moved here to Indiana.

Coincidence #1?: First of all, the Language Training Center. Getting a job there has been wonderful, and I am hoping and praying that I will be able to stay there for a good amount of time. Everytime a teacher gets a new student there, they meet with the ESL coordinator to discuss the student: what language they speak, where they are from, what their goals in English are, and what their language proficiency is. Well...It Just So Happens that at the very first "briefing" I attended for one of my first students, I ran into an OLD friend that I hadn't seen for close to 10 years. To give you a bit of history, when I was 10 I began attending a summer youth camp in southern Indiana, at Shakamack Camp Grounds, made up of several other youth groups. I attended this camp from ages 10-14. During that time (I think the first year, actually), I met this young girl who was around my age. We became good friends and started exchanging letters and Christmas cards throughout the years we attended camp. After the last year I went to camp, I lost contact with this girl and hadn't heard from her since. I thought I knew she attended Taylor Unv. (15 mns. from IWU), but that memory was foggy. SO! Back to the story, I am sitting in this briefing on my new student and there is another girl my age sitting next to me because we are sharing this student. Suddenly she turns to me and says, "If I said FYC to you, would that sound familiar?" -- I glanced off, blinking my eyes several times, hoping to realize what she was saying. Finally, it dawned on me! FYC, or Fellowship Youth Camp, was the name of the youth camp, and looking down on the face sheet, I read her name. "Oh my goodness, Michelle! It's been like what, 9 or 10 years?" (Probably less, but it seemed forever!) So, we finished the briefing just absolutely shocked and stunned. She just so happened to be working at the same company I just got hired at. She just so happened to be an ESL teacher, like me. She just so happened to be sharing a student with me. And, she just so happened to be a great childhood friend that I nearly forgot about. It is great to see you again, Michelle!

Coincidence #2?: This past week was a challenge for me. I've been subbing everyday for two high schools and trying to get into the groove of a good schedule for teaching at night as well. Part of me enjoys this new phase, while the other part really hates it. I'd love to just get into a stable full-time job where I can get myself settled. Well, on Tuesday morning of last week, it JUST SO HAPPENS that I was placed in an ESL classroom. I went in, introduced myself, and let her know what my certification and licensing were in. She was excited to know that I could teach her students, and so we began going through the lesson plan for the day. While we did that, she stopped and said, "This is going to sound really random, but do you have a place to live?" -- I was kind of surprised to hear this and answered that yes, but it was temporary, that I am looking for something longterm. She then explained that her roommate is getting married, the place where she lives is close to where I live now, and the rent is incredibly reasonable. Hesitantly, I said, "Wow, that is so funny that you say all of this because I have actually been...[hesitantly]...praying about a roommate." She looked at me and said, "That's what I was just going to say!" So, she JUST HAPPENS to be an ESL teacher, a Christian, and in need of a roommate. Whether it will work out or not, it JUST SO HAPPENS that I serve an amazing God who knows my needs before I even speak them out, who knows the passions and desires He has given me, who CALLS ME BY NAME, and who has GOT my back. See, Mary, I've got you, Babe.

Wow.

And, I'm sure there are more IT JUST SO HAPPENS stories to come, but for now, I just wanted to share those brief ones.

Praise GOD!

Hinds' Feet On High Places, #1

Finally! I have been wanting to blog for a few weeks now and catch everyone up! There is so much to share -- lessons I am learning in this new season of life, parallels I am seeing between an allegory I am reading for Sunday school and my real life, and of course, updates on my jobs! Praise God!

First I wanted to share with you the book I just began for a Sunday school class called Hinds' feet on High Places, written by Hannah Hurnard. This classical story is about a girl named Much-Afraid who lives in the Valley of Humiliation. I love allegories because what you get out of the text is not necessarily direct and exactly what the author meant or was thinking - but God can pull out and bring to our attention things that we need to learn that are specific to our personal life. Based on my frame of reference, events and attitudes and characters in the story can be perceived slightly different than other people might perceive them. God uses the art of analogies and metaphors all the time to teach and help us make valuable connections in every day life (which is, by the way, one of the reasons I love English so much). But anyways...

Initially, I was confused at the title of Hinds' Feet on High Places. What is that -- like hind feet on a dog? a deer? any four-legged creature? As I began reading, I started to understand. It comes from the book of Habakkuk 3:19. "The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds' feet, and he will make me walk upon mine high places." Basically, the Chief Shepherd (who is God, of course), is described as a being who can bound the hills (like a deer) with great ease, plunging to the depths where the Valley of Humiliation is (where He tends his flocks) and calling to those individuals living there to come with Him to the High Places. The High Places from the book, are described by the Chief Shepherd as follows, "The High Places are the starting places for the journey down to the lowest place in the world. When you have hinds' feet and can go 'leaping on the mountains and skipping on the hills' [which He does], you will be able, as I am, to run down from the heights in gladdest self-giving and then go back up to the mountains again. You will be able to mount to the High Places swifter than eagles, for it is only up on the High Places of Love that anyone can receive the power to pour themselves down in an utter abandonment of self-giving."

So, just to make sure that you're still with me, Much-Afraid is going to go on this journey with the Shepherd and it will enable her to come back to the Valley of Humiliation. Is that all? Nah. The Valley of Humiliation is not exclusive to her. There, she lives among her family, the family of Fearings, who absolutely despise the Shepherd and his workers (those who have already joined Him in the High Places and are back now...I think). Once Much-Afraid meets the Shepherd and agrees to go to the High Places, He tells her to not tell anyone, for they would be very hostile. Just before she leaves for the High Places, her family is trying to get her to marry her cousin, Craven Fear. They keep her captive in her own house when they discover that she is going to leave. Thankfully, she has a friend, Mrs. Valiant, who comes bounding at Much-Afraid's cry for help. She shoos them away and I love the description of this character. "Mrs. Valiant, whose name described her exactly...was not the sort of person to be the least intimidated by what she called, "a pack of idle Fears." Thrusting her face right in through the window, she cried in a threatening voice. "Out of this house you go, this minute, every one of you. If you have not left in three seconds, I shall call the Chief Shepherd. This cottage belongs to him".

There is so much more that I could explain and share with you to catch you up, but I want to pause there because God gave me a very vivid picture of what these "idle fears" look like in my life. Bear with me -- I understand that this is a picture that God gave me personally, so it might not resonate with you personally that way it did with me.

I love the atmosphere of a cozy restaurant. Even more, I love that in places like these, along with coffee shops and book stores, you can combine a warm environment with comfort foods and couches, and great smelling coffee with laughter and friendship (yeah, that totally sounds like I'm writing a cheesy magazine article or something). That's kind of what I love about teaching and having your own classroom as well. You create this environment, unlike any of your other colleagues and in that space, you can foster growth and learning, friendship and mentoring, or just have fun with your students. So, anyways, back to the picture of the restaurant. When I read this portion of Mrs. Valiant coming because of these idle fears, I had this picture in my mind. It was kind of like I was a hostess for this cozy, corner-side restaurant. I can hear the music, I am welcoming guests in and serving them, and the atmosphere is not intense, but just relaxed (like on a Saturday). As guests come in, I am showing them to their seats and sharing how delighted I am that they are here. And I am! By this time in my picture, I am caught up in meeting people and bringing them their food, meeting their needs and getting to know them during the short time they are there. Suddenly, out of no where, I imagine a huge man of sorts with a pig belly that shifts from side to side as he walks towards me. He has a dirty meat knife in his hand and blood stains on a white kitchen apron and he tells me that it is my turn to go back to the meat locker and get something. I imagine we rotate these duties. Afraid, a cold sweat sweeps over my brow as I stand paralyzed at the thought of having to go to the meat locker - a freezer containing the dead carcases of animals whose meat we use for our restaurant. So I begin walking back to the locker, the distance from the front to the back - all of 12 feet -- seeming an eternity and dread. Finally, I reach the door and an overwhelming waft screams at me as I open the heavy door, along with a freezing chill that reaches my toes and then climbs up to my neck. Before me, half a dozen bodies hang from the ceiling, shifting slowly as new wind enters their quarters. I realize that I am terrified of these things. They are disgusting and revolting (in real life, I don't mind things like this). In order to complete my task, however, I must make my way untouched through the maze of heavy swinging bodies to the back of the locker to get something (whatever that may be). I make my way back and suddenly, the door closes. All I can see now is the bright red EXIT sign at the front of the meat locker, glaring on the already-crimson creatures. For a moment, I am paralyzed again and begin to panic. What if I can't get out? What if one of the bodies falls? What if I have to touch one? What if they aren't really dead? (Silly, I realize) What if? What if? What if? Then, after I've had my fill of what-ifs, I realize that all I have to do is find my way back to the EXIT and I can leave. The bodies of meat represent those idle fears in my life. They have NO POWER over me. They are held tightly at the top, unable to walk on their own. They have no REAL LIFE. They, themselves, are IDLE. Taking the EXIT is an act of FAITH and sometimes that is all we see! I have to remind myself that just below the EXIT sign, there is a door. Once I pass from that thresh hold, those fears do not follow me and once I am back in the restaurant, I forget they even exist. Don't let that butcher come and tell you what you need to do! Don't let him ask you to go there, where your idle fears are hanging!