The Ladies of 416...
Ali, Mindy, Jamie, Nicole, Mary Sue, & Melissa
One of my favorites...
Us girls...
Our Album cover...hehe
Mindy and Me
Monday, October 6, 2008
Surrender.
This week in Inductive Bible Study, we have been plunging into Ephesians 5- and I feel as if I am an envrionmentalist in some ways. I am digging through, trying to get to the root of Paul's mind....What was he envisioning? What brought about this fantastic imagery of Christ giving up Himself for the Church, His bride, and then cleansing her "so that He could present Her to Himself"...pure, blameless, holy. That phrase sticks out to me -- He cleansed her to present her to himself -- not to the world or anything else - but to himself. And He gave himself up for her...
My mind has been flooded with tons of different questions in my observations. We haven't gotten to interpretation or application yet in the class...our professor just wants us to make clear, thought-out observations. How is possible that the Church is both His bride and His body - and because it is his body, he takes care of it and nourishes it...WOW.
What woman in her right mind wouldn't want to submit to a man who gave himself up for her?
These past few weeks at school have been rough. I didn't think change really affected me too terribly until I started going through it and analyzing it for myself. Does anyone else share in this? At times I feel like there might be something wrong with me. Why can't I just move on?, I think to myself. And, after all of this...I am left with a bunch of unanswered questions and unanswered thoughts and feelings. I am left dangling on the line like a wet pair of socks...
...and I have come to understand that I just need to surrender.
Why do I cling so hard? Why won't my pride just disappear so that I can trust and not worry about tomorrow or even tonight?
Do not wait to feel worthy, for no one is worthy of My blessings. My grace bypasses your shortcomings, and I give to My children because they ask of Me and because I love them. I do not love one more than another. I give most liberally to those who ask the most of Me, for I love to have you depend on Me. This is why the Spirit within you cries, “Abba—Father.” As your Father, I anticipate your dependence on Me. You may mature and outgrow your dependence on your human parents, but as My child, you will never “outgrow” your spiritual sonship, nor will I ever cast you out to rely on your own resources, not even when you become a parent. Indeed, then you will more fully appreciate My feelings toward you. You will then understand the love a father has for his child, and experience the desire to care for and provide; then you will know more fully how much I love you, how ready I am to help you, and how available I am to counsel with you and give you My support.
Heaven's resources are at your command, and you need never want, so long as 1 am your Shepherd. Do not think that since I know all about you, you need not bother to tell Me. It is true that I know, but you need to tell Me so that in the telling, you may experience the release of an open heart, and the fellowship of a Friend.
As you open your heart to Me, I will come to you. As you speak to Me, I will speak to you. As you reveal yourself to Me, I will reveal Myself to you. This is a law of life. There must be action to bring reaction. There must be a question to bring an answer. There must be an expression of love and confidence on the part of one person to arouse a corresponding response in another person.
Never presume My presence. Never assume that knowing your need, I will automatically supply Ask, and it shall be given. Call upon Me, and I will answer you. Tell Me that you love Me, and I will make your heart know in a very real way My love for you and My nearness, and you shall never feel alone.
Welcome Me into your heart, and the more you sense My presence within you, the more you will feel at home no matter where you may be. Forget anything else, but never forget this."
I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christlives in me; and the life which I now live in the fleshI live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. (Galatians 2:20, also written by Paul)
My mind has been flooded with tons of different questions in my observations. We haven't gotten to interpretation or application yet in the class...our professor just wants us to make clear, thought-out observations. How is possible that the Church is both His bride and His body - and because it is his body, he takes care of it and nourishes it...WOW.
What woman in her right mind wouldn't want to submit to a man who gave himself up for her?
These past few weeks at school have been rough. I didn't think change really affected me too terribly until I started going through it and analyzing it for myself. Does anyone else share in this? At times I feel like there might be something wrong with me. Why can't I just move on?, I think to myself. And, after all of this...I am left with a bunch of unanswered questions and unanswered thoughts and feelings. I am left dangling on the line like a wet pair of socks...
...and I have come to understand that I just need to surrender.
Why do I cling so hard? Why won't my pride just disappear so that I can trust and not worry about tomorrow or even tonight?
"My child, give Me your heart, for out of it issues life. My hand is upon you, and I will keep you in all places wherever you go. I am your God, and I am your Father, and I will care for you and provide for you according to all that you need. I will be at your side, ready to help you whenever you call on Me. I am not unmindful of your needs, and My concern is for you. You do not need to carry your own load, for I will be happy to help you carry it and to bear you up as well. You do not walk alone or meet any situation alone, for I am with you, and I will give you wisdom and strength, and My blessing shall be yours. Keep your heart set on Me and your affections on things above; for I cannot bless you unless you ask Me. And I cannot answer if you do not call. I cannot minister to you unless you come to Me.
Do not wait to feel worthy, for no one is worthy of My blessings. My grace bypasses your shortcomings, and I give to My children because they ask of Me and because I love them. I do not love one more than another. I give most liberally to those who ask the most of Me, for I love to have you depend on Me. This is why the Spirit within you cries, “Abba—Father.” As your Father, I anticipate your dependence on Me. You may mature and outgrow your dependence on your human parents, but as My child, you will never “outgrow” your spiritual sonship, nor will I ever cast you out to rely on your own resources, not even when you become a parent. Indeed, then you will more fully appreciate My feelings toward you. You will then understand the love a father has for his child, and experience the desire to care for and provide; then you will know more fully how much I love you, how ready I am to help you, and how available I am to counsel with you and give you My support.
Heaven's resources are at your command, and you need never want, so long as 1 am your Shepherd. Do not think that since I know all about you, you need not bother to tell Me. It is true that I know, but you need to tell Me so that in the telling, you may experience the release of an open heart, and the fellowship of a Friend.
As you open your heart to Me, I will come to you. As you speak to Me, I will speak to you. As you reveal yourself to Me, I will reveal Myself to you. This is a law of life. There must be action to bring reaction. There must be a question to bring an answer. There must be an expression of love and confidence on the part of one person to arouse a corresponding response in another person.
Never presume My presence. Never assume that knowing your need, I will automatically supply Ask, and it shall be given. Call upon Me, and I will answer you. Tell Me that you love Me, and I will make your heart know in a very real way My love for you and My nearness, and you shall never feel alone.
Welcome Me into your heart, and the more you sense My presence within you, the more you will feel at home no matter where you may be. Forget anything else, but never forget this."
Frances J. Roberts, Come Away My Beloved
I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christlives in me; and the life which I now live in the fleshI live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. (Galatians 2:20, also written by Paul)
Friday, September 19, 2008
Loneliness in the Crowd
I have entered a new season in life - one that requires more trust, more reliance, and more faith in His truth to carry me. I remember his words to me during practicum last year after one of my lessons flopped: "I will carry you." Jesus, I need to hear that again.
While living on a beautiful campus, in the midst of a thriving metropolis of young people - searching and seeking that which satisfies - God or the World - I feel lonely in the midst of the crowds. No one understands the deepths of what I say or feel. No one understands why my heart is ensconced with trouble at different things I sense in the Spirit. I am reminded that the Father was Jesus' only source. From him and the Holy Spirit, he had to teach what God taught him - not what he thought up and then had a friend confirm his faith on -- and the wellspring of life flowed freely through him -- where as I must do the same and cannot rely on those around me to help cover the questions and wounds I bear with their full, but shallow laughter. I can't rely on anyone just now because no one is that close anymore. They are gone. I must rely on the Lord for my confidence and faith in the convictions he has placed before my heart.
There is an unsettling thought that this hunger for community that I am without now - might be turned to thoughts of marriage or dating - when they really should be for the Lord. "I pray that they would be one, as we are one, Father."
That, in a nutshell is my heart tonight. I hunger and thirst for more, but it is hard when no one around you is spuring you on and encouraging you to go deeper. I cry as I think about and write these words. God, I desire more. What if the community around me doesn't? What if this happens when I go to China, as I suspect it will? What if my dad isn't just a phone call away? What if I continue to find myself sitting in empty apartments without fellowship with others who deeply desire God?
I need to take a deep breath and search for the vision God would give me. I need to step back and refocus. I need to seek the Lord on this very thing.
While living on a beautiful campus, in the midst of a thriving metropolis of young people - searching and seeking that which satisfies - God or the World - I feel lonely in the midst of the crowds. No one understands the deepths of what I say or feel. No one understands why my heart is ensconced with trouble at different things I sense in the Spirit. I am reminded that the Father was Jesus' only source. From him and the Holy Spirit, he had to teach what God taught him - not what he thought up and then had a friend confirm his faith on -- and the wellspring of life flowed freely through him -- where as I must do the same and cannot rely on those around me to help cover the questions and wounds I bear with their full, but shallow laughter. I can't rely on anyone just now because no one is that close anymore. They are gone. I must rely on the Lord for my confidence and faith in the convictions he has placed before my heart.
There is an unsettling thought that this hunger for community that I am without now - might be turned to thoughts of marriage or dating - when they really should be for the Lord. "I pray that they would be one, as we are one, Father."
That, in a nutshell is my heart tonight. I hunger and thirst for more, but it is hard when no one around you is spuring you on and encouraging you to go deeper. I cry as I think about and write these words. God, I desire more. What if the community around me doesn't? What if this happens when I go to China, as I suspect it will? What if my dad isn't just a phone call away? What if I continue to find myself sitting in empty apartments without fellowship with others who deeply desire God?
I need to take a deep breath and search for the vision God would give me. I need to step back and refocus. I need to seek the Lord on this very thing.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Playing teacher...
Today was my very first day of student-teaching. I will do a week now at the beginning of the year (as required by IWU) and then do my official placements in January 2009.
The opening conference for all of the schools in the district was very inspiring - in fact, I was so proud to be counted among them. I was reminded of why passion floods my heart when I think of having students, teaching lessons, and mentoring.
There will be lots to do this week. We are hoping that all of the ELP (English Language Proficiency) tests come in so that we can begin to put lessons and activities together. Again, there is the temptation to get annoyed with all of the standardized testing. These kids are not treated justly. Think about this: how easily would you survive if you had to move to another country with your parents when you were younger and they enrolled you into public schools. The school officials expect you to then take a standardized test and achieve the average scores of a native speaker. Stressful? And that isn't even the half of it. What about your parents trying to find work with their limited skills in that country's primary language? Body language can go far, but so can confusion!
So, I am trying to keep a positive chin up.
There were other interesting points today, too. We had a meeting for our building where I met a lot of the teachers. The principle lead a discussion about the new school year, which was really great, too. Lots of food for thought.
In the midst of all these teachers - those who had gone before me and completed the intense requirements of student-teaching - I felt comfortable for a little while. We were at a meeting and someone asked me a question. I answered it plainly, from the perspective of a student-teacher. Afterwords, I felt like such a little girl trying to play teacher. It was like that shyness I had in grade school woke up from a long slumber, stretched its arms, and laid them over my shoulders. I felt it's arms cling to me as I walked past the teachers, my eyes meeting theirs with a smile. I wasn't ashamed, and the teachers knew that I was a novice to all of this. I just felt plain silly though. I thought, 'is this really me?'
The teachers were encouraging - as much as they could be in our limited interaction - and my co-op teacher was wonderful. She was so encouraging. She reminded me to stop looking at the big picture for now - just worry about one thing at a time, one day at a time. She said that there was no mistake big enough that I could make that would mess everything up and that would cause me to fail. That was encouraging.
Still, I find myself wondering if I can really do it. I wonder, seriously - if this is where God wants me. I see my weaknesses and know that I will not be everything to everyone (which I couldn't be anyway, that is God). God reminded me as we were driving today that He works in my weaknesses. There -in the middle of my weaknesses - He shows His strength. I am trusting in this. I just felt like God was asking me all day if I trusted Him. I have been worrying about gas money this week because of driving about an hour to 75 minutes a day. Everytime I looked to the gas gage, He said - "Do you trust me?" - As the tick kept going down slowly, I have had to look away, concentrate on driving (hehe, thats a good idea, right?) and choose to trust in His provision. God IS my provider, He IS my sustainer.
I am also in the midst of trying to finish my sponsor letters for you all! I hope that I will be able to get them out soon. Please be in prayer for China and for my trip. Pray that God would burden people's hearts for the trip and that would drive them to an altar of prayer. Please pray that He would provide the finances through His people.
I think that is all the reflections I have for now...gee, its nice to be back at IWU (even if it is for a week) and have the internet!
Ciao.
The opening conference for all of the schools in the district was very inspiring - in fact, I was so proud to be counted among them. I was reminded of why passion floods my heart when I think of having students, teaching lessons, and mentoring.
There will be lots to do this week. We are hoping that all of the ELP (English Language Proficiency) tests come in so that we can begin to put lessons and activities together. Again, there is the temptation to get annoyed with all of the standardized testing. These kids are not treated justly. Think about this: how easily would you survive if you had to move to another country with your parents when you were younger and they enrolled you into public schools. The school officials expect you to then take a standardized test and achieve the average scores of a native speaker. Stressful? And that isn't even the half of it. What about your parents trying to find work with their limited skills in that country's primary language? Body language can go far, but so can confusion!
So, I am trying to keep a positive chin up.
There were other interesting points today, too. We had a meeting for our building where I met a lot of the teachers. The principle lead a discussion about the new school year, which was really great, too. Lots of food for thought.
In the midst of all these teachers - those who had gone before me and completed the intense requirements of student-teaching - I felt comfortable for a little while. We were at a meeting and someone asked me a question. I answered it plainly, from the perspective of a student-teacher. Afterwords, I felt like such a little girl trying to play teacher. It was like that shyness I had in grade school woke up from a long slumber, stretched its arms, and laid them over my shoulders. I felt it's arms cling to me as I walked past the teachers, my eyes meeting theirs with a smile. I wasn't ashamed, and the teachers knew that I was a novice to all of this. I just felt plain silly though. I thought, 'is this really me?'
The teachers were encouraging - as much as they could be in our limited interaction - and my co-op teacher was wonderful. She was so encouraging. She reminded me to stop looking at the big picture for now - just worry about one thing at a time, one day at a time. She said that there was no mistake big enough that I could make that would mess everything up and that would cause me to fail. That was encouraging.
Still, I find myself wondering if I can really do it. I wonder, seriously - if this is where God wants me. I see my weaknesses and know that I will not be everything to everyone (which I couldn't be anyway, that is God). God reminded me as we were driving today that He works in my weaknesses. There -in the middle of my weaknesses - He shows His strength. I am trusting in this. I just felt like God was asking me all day if I trusted Him. I have been worrying about gas money this week because of driving about an hour to 75 minutes a day. Everytime I looked to the gas gage, He said - "Do you trust me?" - As the tick kept going down slowly, I have had to look away, concentrate on driving (hehe, thats a good idea, right?) and choose to trust in His provision. God IS my provider, He IS my sustainer.
I am also in the midst of trying to finish my sponsor letters for you all! I hope that I will be able to get them out soon. Please be in prayer for China and for my trip. Pray that God would burden people's hearts for the trip and that would drive them to an altar of prayer. Please pray that He would provide the finances through His people.
I think that is all the reflections I have for now...gee, its nice to be back at IWU (even if it is for a week) and have the internet!
Ciao.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Wedding Madness!
This is the summer of weddings, for sure! The first wedding, Dena & David's was really fun and wasn't stressful. Now, only four days from my roomie's wedding - Beth's - and things are nuts! First problem - my phone company didn't receive my family's phone bill and since I am still on my parents plan, they shut off our phones - ERG! I am also working nights this week, so I am coming home in the morning and trying to sleep for a while and then trying to finish plans with the bachelorette party and finish writing the toast that I have to give on satuday...
Its a fun kinda madness.
Its a fun kinda madness.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Long time, no scribbles...
So, its been a while since I last posted. A lot has happened. It really has been good to be home, although I think I should have taken a job in IN for the summer. Picking up hours at work hasn't been what I thought it would be and I could kick myself for the other job offers this summer that I didn't take! Oh well. The Lord knew what would happen and He has sustained me. There has been pressure to work as much as I can because of China coming up. I am trying to save as much as possible before I send prayer letters out, so I get stressed when my hours at work get cut. Today, the Lord helped me to just stop fretting and trust. I can be a very analytical person at times - I try to understand all the details and predict God's next move - but God speaks to us with such love and firmness - to trust in HIM with all of our hearts and not our own understanding...I praise the Lord for bringing me away from the mulberry bush of my own reasoning that I love to run around from time to time.
Time with my family this summer has been really good - we are all growing up and that makes things easier in some ways. It hit me at times before, but I never realized how beautiful my sisters really are. Kristen just graduated and I cannot tell you how proud I was of her! She and my dad both gave a speech at the ceremony - and I was brought to tears. Family time has been great, too. My prayers have been centered around them a lot lately - Kristen and Kayla, mostly. I desire them to love Jesus with all of their hearts, beyond any other aspiration. Please join me in prayer for them.
Mom and Dad celebrated their 27 Wedding Anniversary on friday! Can you believe it?! The funny thing is...usually guys forget stuff like that...but no! This year, mom completely forgot about it! Dad showed up at home with flowers and she was so surprised! Way to go, Dad! I'm so proud of him...hehe...
My plans for the rest of the summer remain as follows: be Beth's maid of honor on saturday (YAY!), continue to work at MRYH (a youth detention home), save more money for China, buy a laptop, find a family to live with in Kokomo (for the first portion of my student teaching), and hang out with friends and family as much as I can. Ooo, and get some new workout videos.
Lotsa love.
Time with my family this summer has been really good - we are all growing up and that makes things easier in some ways. It hit me at times before, but I never realized how beautiful my sisters really are. Kristen just graduated and I cannot tell you how proud I was of her! She and my dad both gave a speech at the ceremony - and I was brought to tears. Family time has been great, too. My prayers have been centered around them a lot lately - Kristen and Kayla, mostly. I desire them to love Jesus with all of their hearts, beyond any other aspiration. Please join me in prayer for them.
Mom and Dad celebrated their 27 Wedding Anniversary on friday! Can you believe it?! The funny thing is...usually guys forget stuff like that...but no! This year, mom completely forgot about it! Dad showed up at home with flowers and she was so surprised! Way to go, Dad! I'm so proud of him...hehe...
My plans for the rest of the summer remain as follows: be Beth's maid of honor on saturday (YAY!), continue to work at MRYH (a youth detention home), save more money for China, buy a laptop, find a family to live with in Kokomo (for the first portion of my student teaching), and hang out with friends and family as much as I can. Ooo, and get some new workout videos.
Lotsa love.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Back in the Glove...
Well, I have made it safely back to MI and I've been wading through my bedroom-- I haven't quite got everything in its place. There are boxes and containers and stuff that needs to be tossed...for the last few nights I had been sleeping on our couch...and finally - I was able to clear away the stuff on my bed and sleep well! And...I must say...I really enjoyed the blessing of having a bed of clean sheets and new comfy padding below...thanks to Mom.
As much as I love adventure, the segues that lead to change do have interesting affects on me. Already, it has been nice to be reminded that God's love embodies the blessings He sends. There are certain things that comfort me at home - laughing and being goofy while watching movies with my sisters, taking long drives with Dad, being goofy with Mom - and the conversations that surround those things. But, when you are living with others, you get the good, the bad, and the ugly. Although this sounds so juvenille and naive, living life with people can get messy.
I hadn't anticipated the change it would be- at least the emotions that it would bring to move home again. With finals that kept me busy, I hadn't taken the time to mentally prepare to live at home again. It is an adjustment - and at times - I would like to be finished here in MI. However, God is teaching me to be thankful in all things. So, I am drawing on His power and strength. I want to live victoriously no matter where I am - I do not want to have a "form of godliness" - I want to live in the grace that God provides daily, along with His mercies that are new each morning.
As much as I love adventure, the segues that lead to change do have interesting affects on me. Already, it has been nice to be reminded that God's love embodies the blessings He sends. There are certain things that comfort me at home - laughing and being goofy while watching movies with my sisters, taking long drives with Dad, being goofy with Mom - and the conversations that surround those things. But, when you are living with others, you get the good, the bad, and the ugly. Although this sounds so juvenille and naive, living life with people can get messy.
I hadn't anticipated the change it would be- at least the emotions that it would bring to move home again. With finals that kept me busy, I hadn't taken the time to mentally prepare to live at home again. It is an adjustment - and at times - I would like to be finished here in MI. However, God is teaching me to be thankful in all things. So, I am drawing on His power and strength. I want to live victoriously no matter where I am - I do not want to have a "form of godliness" - I want to live in the grace that God provides daily, along with His mercies that are new each morning.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Giving Thanks...
~the weather was wonderful today! It was at least 75 degrees out and there was a lovely breeze!
~God's goodness during this last week. I get to spend this weekend with Christina, and today Dena and I had a chance to be goofy together in the midst of crazy finals.
~My finals were finished yesterday, and I just have to finish the details of a paper and binder and turn them in tomorrow. Yay! What a great feeling it is to be done! It feels so weird to not have any pressing - and I mean PRESSING - responsibilities. Today was a day of odds and ends and I felt like I could really and truly relax!
~School has been wonderful this year - ahh...so many great memories! so many great times of victory! so many times that tried the soul, but valuable lessons that were learned. Its been good and thats all there is to it!
~I get to stay for graduation! I was praying and hoping that I would - and it just so happens that I am able! Yay! Christina and I are going to spend the night with some of our friends and then leave after graduation on saturday. Relaxing with a kindred spirit sounds great!
~I get to read for fun this summer!
~God's peace has truly been with me in regards to everything changing today. I am thankful and I want to continue to be thankful for His grace and blessings to me over the past four years. He really is so good - in the midst of it all. He is my God, He has created all things, He allows seasons in our life to come and go. I pray that I will be found praising Him - regardless of the good or bad.
~My emotions have stabilized...for now. :) hehehe....
~God's goodness during this last week. I get to spend this weekend with Christina, and today Dena and I had a chance to be goofy together in the midst of crazy finals.
~My finals were finished yesterday, and I just have to finish the details of a paper and binder and turn them in tomorrow. Yay! What a great feeling it is to be done! It feels so weird to not have any pressing - and I mean PRESSING - responsibilities. Today was a day of odds and ends and I felt like I could really and truly relax!
~School has been wonderful this year - ahh...so many great memories! so many great times of victory! so many times that tried the soul, but valuable lessons that were learned. Its been good and thats all there is to it!
~I get to stay for graduation! I was praying and hoping that I would - and it just so happens that I am able! Yay! Christina and I are going to spend the night with some of our friends and then leave after graduation on saturday. Relaxing with a kindred spirit sounds great!
~I get to read for fun this summer!
~God's peace has truly been with me in regards to everything changing today. I am thankful and I want to continue to be thankful for His grace and blessings to me over the past four years. He really is so good - in the midst of it all. He is my God, He has created all things, He allows seasons in our life to come and go. I pray that I will be found praising Him - regardless of the good or bad.
~My emotions have stabilized...for now. :) hehehe....
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Friday, April 18, 2008
Earthquake!!!
This morning, I awoke half-conciously to an earthquake! It had hit in West-Salem, Illinois and all around - we felt the aftershock (along the Wabash Valley Fault Zone)! It was reported that people in the loop in Chicago felt it and even a building in Louisville was damaged because of it. Crazy! I have never been in an earthquake!
I thought it was a dream - so I went back to sleep thinking it was nothing. Then, I got up and checked statuses on facebook - people left comments like "felt the quake at 5:30", etc. Then, I went to the student center and heard people talking about it, too! It was real! Wow! People in CA would be laughing at me, but hey! I survived my first quake! Yippie!
So, finals are next week. Dad reminded me last night on the phone to praise Him for everything - to be thankful in "all things." So, although my best friends are graduating and I will be a fifth year, I am thankful -- so thankful-- for the time we were allowed to have. It has truly changed my life. They are my best friends - my kindred spirits - my sisters. I am thankful, because God has used them greatly in my life.
And, I need to be thankful for my work load. God has allowed me to study - something I LOVE - and even though I can get really overwhelmed at the stuff left to do, God will enable me to accomplish it. And for those things, I will praise Him, because I know that I cannot do them on my own. I am thankful for the last two papers, notebook, and two tests I have to study for and complete. I am thankful - because He has allowed all of it. Thank-you, Father.
Take up the shield of Faith and Fix your eyes on Jesus - the author and perfecter of our Faith - He will not let us down.
I thought it was a dream - so I went back to sleep thinking it was nothing. Then, I got up and checked statuses on facebook - people left comments like "felt the quake at 5:30", etc. Then, I went to the student center and heard people talking about it, too! It was real! Wow! People in CA would be laughing at me, but hey! I survived my first quake! Yippie!
So, finals are next week. Dad reminded me last night on the phone to praise Him for everything - to be thankful in "all things." So, although my best friends are graduating and I will be a fifth year, I am thankful -- so thankful-- for the time we were allowed to have. It has truly changed my life. They are my best friends - my kindred spirits - my sisters. I am thankful, because God has used them greatly in my life.
And, I need to be thankful for my work load. God has allowed me to study - something I LOVE - and even though I can get really overwhelmed at the stuff left to do, God will enable me to accomplish it. And for those things, I will praise Him, because I know that I cannot do them on my own. I am thankful for the last two papers, notebook, and two tests I have to study for and complete. I am thankful - because He has allowed all of it. Thank-you, Father.
Take up the shield of Faith and Fix your eyes on Jesus - the author and perfecter of our Faith - He will not let us down.
CHINA IS OFFICIAL!
So, I got the official word that I am moving to China for two months to complete my student teaching! I cannot tell you how excited I am. I have been waiting for those words of confirmation for so long! Finally, when they arrived -- ahhhh!!! I think I jumped three feet in the air at the email I received confirming everything! So now the long process of preparing will take place - but I am so excited. I am thrilled to prepare - to read, to learn, to save -- yay!
Already, it has been so neat to see how God is preparing me. Earlier this semester, God put it on my heart to speak to my church about what He has done and what He is doing. A few days ago (last week, I think), I just got so excited as I was journaling - I began to practice what I would say! It is such a testimony that God's presence is all-encompassing. He is before me, beside me, above me, behind me, in me - for it is God who works in me "both to will and to do for His good pleasure" (Phil. 2:13). I will be in Tianjin, China - which is southeast of Beijing on the coast, a train ride away. I am preparing myself to go alone - I don't think I will have any roommates from school that will be placed in the same town. I will probably have other Christian roommates...but only God knows.
This is real! It is going to happen! I am seeing this bud of a dream start to open up and blossom! At first, it was this vast country - China. Now, it is an international Christian school in Tianjin. I now know how to pray specifically and who to pray for. I have the names of my co-op teachers and principal. I am excited and a little nervous (even though it is months away). Ahh! The excitement and reality that it will be a job, not just a trip - is also rising. I am excited to meet my students and to learn about their culture and to see God in a different place.
Praise God with me, today. Praise God with me, today!
Already, it has been so neat to see how God is preparing me. Earlier this semester, God put it on my heart to speak to my church about what He has done and what He is doing. A few days ago (last week, I think), I just got so excited as I was journaling - I began to practice what I would say! It is such a testimony that God's presence is all-encompassing. He is before me, beside me, above me, behind me, in me - for it is God who works in me "both to will and to do for His good pleasure" (Phil. 2:13). I will be in Tianjin, China - which is southeast of Beijing on the coast, a train ride away. I am preparing myself to go alone - I don't think I will have any roommates from school that will be placed in the same town. I will probably have other Christian roommates...but only God knows.
This is real! It is going to happen! I am seeing this bud of a dream start to open up and blossom! At first, it was this vast country - China. Now, it is an international Christian school in Tianjin. I now know how to pray specifically and who to pray for. I have the names of my co-op teachers and principal. I am excited and a little nervous (even though it is months away). Ahh! The excitement and reality that it will be a job, not just a trip - is also rising. I am excited to meet my students and to learn about their culture and to see God in a different place.
Praise God with me, today. Praise God with me, today!
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Giving Thanks...
~the SUN is shining today! We have our apartment windows opened and it is beautiful!
~a wonderful night of rest...*sighs*
~time to get things done!
~God's presence - I rest in the fact that I only have to live for right now, rely on His grace for me right now, love people right now. Looking into the future can be so overwhelming and distracting - the enemy has used it to steal my joy and peace. Don't let him! You have enough grace for today! My friend, Sara, posted on her blog "Every now and again I feel like I am living in limbo, I feel like I don't know what I'm doing, where I'm going, or what I should be doing. I know that I'm not actually living in limbo, I'm actually living by Faith. Because I know that Jesus is the Lord of my life, I know that my life and circumstances are all in His hands and plans. I do not need to worry about what's happening tomorrow. I just need to focus on what's happening today. Hebrews 11:1 Faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see. I am certain that God is in control right now, even through I feel like I have no clue about what's happening around me.Tonight I was having coffee with a good friend who reminded me to live with the eyes of faith. Live as though Christ is going to intervene and make a way. She reminded me about Moses as he was called upon to lead the Israelites. Little did she know that God has spoken to me in so many ways through the life of Moses. I am also reminded of Peter, who had to step by faith as he stepped out of the boat, onto the water, towards Jesus. Right now I must keep stepping toward Jesus one day at a time. Each step by faith, knowing that He is who He says He is, I am who He says I am, He can do what He says He can do, I can do all things through Christ, and His Word is alive and active in me. I need to get back out of the boat again and try out my sea legs a bit more." That was so encouraging to me...I just need to rely on God's goodness for today.
~the SUN is shining!!! YAY!!
~a wonderful night of rest...*sighs*
~time to get things done!
~God's presence - I rest in the fact that I only have to live for right now, rely on His grace for me right now, love people right now. Looking into the future can be so overwhelming and distracting - the enemy has used it to steal my joy and peace. Don't let him! You have enough grace for today! My friend, Sara, posted on her blog "Every now and again I feel like I am living in limbo, I feel like I don't know what I'm doing, where I'm going, or what I should be doing. I know that I'm not actually living in limbo, I'm actually living by Faith. Because I know that Jesus is the Lord of my life, I know that my life and circumstances are all in His hands and plans. I do not need to worry about what's happening tomorrow. I just need to focus on what's happening today. Hebrews 11:1 Faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see. I am certain that God is in control right now, even through I feel like I have no clue about what's happening around me.Tonight I was having coffee with a good friend who reminded me to live with the eyes of faith. Live as though Christ is going to intervene and make a way. She reminded me about Moses as he was called upon to lead the Israelites. Little did she know that God has spoken to me in so many ways through the life of Moses. I am also reminded of Peter, who had to step by faith as he stepped out of the boat, onto the water, towards Jesus. Right now I must keep stepping toward Jesus one day at a time. Each step by faith, knowing that He is who He says He is, I am who He says I am, He can do what He says He can do, I can do all things through Christ, and His Word is alive and active in me. I need to get back out of the boat again and try out my sea legs a bit more." That was so encouraging to me...I just need to rely on God's goodness for today.
~the SUN is shining!!! YAY!!
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Hosanna
Verse 1
I see the king of glory
Coming down the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes
I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing, the people sing
Chorus
Hosanna, hosanna
Hosanna in the highest
Verse 2
I see a generation
Rising up to take the place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a new revival
Staring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees
Bridge
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity
I see the king of glory
Coming down the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes
I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing, the people sing
Chorus
Hosanna, hosanna
Hosanna in the highest
Verse 2
I see a generation
Rising up to take the place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a new revival
Staring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees
Bridge
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity
Savior King
Verse 1
And now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of power that raised Christ from the dead
And now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is ? and I'm more blessed
Pre-chorus
Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your Son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our king
Chorus
We love you Lord, we worship you
You are our God, you alone are good
You asked your Son to carry this
The heavy cross our weight of sin
I love you Lord, I worship you
Hope which was lost, now stands renewed
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
Verse 2
Let now your church shine as the bride
That you soar in your heart as you offered up your life
Let now the lost be welcomed home
By the saved and redeemed those adopted as your own
Ending
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
And now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of power that raised Christ from the dead
And now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is ? and I'm more blessed
Pre-chorus
Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your Son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our king
Chorus
We love you Lord, we worship you
You are our God, you alone are good
You asked your Son to carry this
The heavy cross our weight of sin
I love you Lord, I worship you
Hope which was lost, now stands renewed
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
Verse 2
Let now your church shine as the bride
That you soar in your heart as you offered up your life
Let now the lost be welcomed home
By the saved and redeemed those adopted as your own
Ending
I give my life to honor this
The love of Christ, the savior king
Saturday, March 15, 2008
I Want to Do a Beautiful Work
"He is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name." Acts 9:15
You are Mine. You are not your own. With a great price I have purchased you for Myself. I am not dismayed that you do not comprehend, but I say that if you will listen to Me, I will reveal to you more fully so that you may know more clearly how vital you are to My purpose. There is work to be done, and I need you as a vessel through which to work. Not a vassal, but a vessel. I want to do a beautiful work.
I need an individual to use who is not only available and suitable, but who loves Me in such a way as to enhance My creation. I desire not the kind of loyalty a soldier gives to his country, but a dedicated devotion of the type of love a mother feels toward her unborn child.
There will be inconveniences to be borne, self-pleasing to be laid aside, sacrifices and pain-but what a blessed reward I have in store! Yes, in store for you, if you are able to let Me use you the way I desire.
You are not unworthy; you are not unprepared. You have no reason to hold back unless your love for Me is too small. If this is the only hindrance, draw closer to Me, and I will pour My love out upon you so that your affection for Me may be deepened and perfected. Lo, I wait for you. Come to Me.
Frances J. Roberts - "Come Away My Beloved"
You are Mine. You are not your own. With a great price I have purchased you for Myself. I am not dismayed that you do not comprehend, but I say that if you will listen to Me, I will reveal to you more fully so that you may know more clearly how vital you are to My purpose. There is work to be done, and I need you as a vessel through which to work. Not a vassal, but a vessel. I want to do a beautiful work.
I need an individual to use who is not only available and suitable, but who loves Me in such a way as to enhance My creation. I desire not the kind of loyalty a soldier gives to his country, but a dedicated devotion of the type of love a mother feels toward her unborn child.
There will be inconveniences to be borne, self-pleasing to be laid aside, sacrifices and pain-but what a blessed reward I have in store! Yes, in store for you, if you are able to let Me use you the way I desire.
You are not unworthy; you are not unprepared. You have no reason to hold back unless your love for Me is too small. If this is the only hindrance, draw closer to Me, and I will pour My love out upon you so that your affection for Me may be deepened and perfected. Lo, I wait for you. Come to Me.
Frances J. Roberts - "Come Away My Beloved"
Monday, March 10, 2008
Make Over Pour Moi
So, here is a fun waste of time!
Which goofy hairstyle looks the best? Don't worry - I am keeping my long hair - this is just for fun!
Which goofy hairstyle looks the best? Don't worry - I am keeping my long hair - this is just for fun!
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Joshua 24:15
And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
Psalm 25:12
What man is he that feareth the LORD? him shall he teach in the way that he shall choose.
Psalm 65:4
Blessed is the man You choose,
And cause to approach You,
That he may dwell in Your courts.
We shall be satisfied with the goodness of Your house,
Of Your holy temple.
And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.
Psalm 25:12
What man is he that feareth the LORD? him shall he teach in the way that he shall choose.
Psalm 65:4
Blessed is the man You choose,
And cause to approach You,
That he may dwell in Your courts.
We shall be satisfied with the goodness of Your house,
Of Your holy temple.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Savory Oreo Truffles...
Ingredients
45 Oreo cookies , divided (1 package)
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese , softened
2 (8 ounce) packages semisweet baking chocolate , melted
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese , softened
2 (8 ounce) packages semisweet baking chocolate , melted
Directions
1. Crush 9 of the cookies to fine crumbs in a food processor; reserve for later use. (This can also be done in a resealable bag with a rolling pin.).
2. Crush the remaining 36 cookies to fine crumbs and place in a medium bowl.
3. Add the cream cheese and mix until well blended.
4. Roll cookie mixture into 42 balls, about 1" in diameter.
5. Dip the balls in the melted chocolate and place them on
a wax paper covered baking sheet.
(Any left over chocolate can be stored at room temperature for another use.).
6. Sprinkle the tops of the truffles with the reserved cookie crumbs.
7. Refrigerate until firm, about 1 hour.
8. Store leftover truffles, covered, in the refrigerator.
9. Eat to your heart's delight.
And think of me - I gave up sweets for lent this year!
Ahhh...the joy of friendship...
Those cookies were excellent! Mmmm!
Enjoying each other's company...
Yep, its true. These girls are my best friends and they truly exemplify the body of Christ. Living with these women has taught me a great deal about what loving God means, the power of prayer, and what my job is as a daughter of the King. They have stood with me through the thick and thin - through victories and heart aches, through mistakes and goofiness. Together, we are the body of Christ - His bride - and what a priviledge it has been. As we continue on in life seeking God's will and His heart, I don't think any of us will forget our friendship or the growth that has taken place in each of us over the past four years. Although very different each one of us are, we are all connected by a blood that goes much deeper than that which is vitally supporting our physical bodies. We are connected through our redemption in Christ - and what a beautiful thing that is. It's because of His intentional love and guidance, His sharpening, and His careful watch over each of us.
May we continue to change so that we are mistaken for Jesus.
Shalom, friends and sisters.
Monday, February 18, 2008
And the adventure continues...
So, I have been documenting on my bedroom door the adventure I am having with God. At the top, I have a card that says, "My adventure with God" and then a corresponding card for every victory and triumph God has brought to bring me closer to China. How exciting it is! To know that I am not only on a physical journey, but a faith journey - that my faith is being deepened and I am learning to trust Him more fully - it is so exciting! Praise Him! He is good!
The last card I posted was "Pre-Interview with Dr. Bassett, ISC" - and next to it is a check mark! The next challenge will be to complete my "disposition" sheet with my practicum supervisor. Pray that I can finish it soon! I have to turn it in ASAP, and they have all been so patient.
The cool thing about this adventure is that I am living a whole other life outside of my China adventure and that ITSELF is an adventure. I am preparing to speak at a purity conference in March. The Lord has asked me to do this, and I really didn't want to at first. There is such joy in obedience though! Although there has been a lot of opposition and attacks from the enemy, God has been stepping in and giving me truth and a gameplan for the direction of my talk. I will be speaking for two sessions and sharing my testimony. I am glad that I am able to do this - I just pray that HE would so heavily lay upon my heart the things that need to be said, as well as continue to manifest Himself to me through His Word - so that when I share, I can share with a humble heart and honest spirit. Many girls are isolated in regards to purity. They've done things or whatnot and it is hard to bear one's soul and tell the truth - for fear of rejection or humiliation. However, I want to share truth with them - and I want to bring to light that when we expose satan's plans to the LIGHT - he has lost his foothold. For where there is LIGHT, no darkness can prevail. I pray that freedom may be found for these women. AHH!! There is such joy in freedom from the past, from sin, from who I thought I was! FREEDOM. Drink it in, brothers and sisters!
The last card I posted was "Pre-Interview with Dr. Bassett, ISC" - and next to it is a check mark! The next challenge will be to complete my "disposition" sheet with my practicum supervisor. Pray that I can finish it soon! I have to turn it in ASAP, and they have all been so patient.
The cool thing about this adventure is that I am living a whole other life outside of my China adventure and that ITSELF is an adventure. I am preparing to speak at a purity conference in March. The Lord has asked me to do this, and I really didn't want to at first. There is such joy in obedience though! Although there has been a lot of opposition and attacks from the enemy, God has been stepping in and giving me truth and a gameplan for the direction of my talk. I will be speaking for two sessions and sharing my testimony. I am glad that I am able to do this - I just pray that HE would so heavily lay upon my heart the things that need to be said, as well as continue to manifest Himself to me through His Word - so that when I share, I can share with a humble heart and honest spirit. Many girls are isolated in regards to purity. They've done things or whatnot and it is hard to bear one's soul and tell the truth - for fear of rejection or humiliation. However, I want to share truth with them - and I want to bring to light that when we expose satan's plans to the LIGHT - he has lost his foothold. For where there is LIGHT, no darkness can prevail. I pray that freedom may be found for these women. AHH!! There is such joy in freedom from the past, from sin, from who I thought I was! FREEDOM. Drink it in, brothers and sisters!
STAND FIRM, Handmaiden of God!
Satan will come and say, "that's a sin, how could you do that?"
Then he will turn around and say,
"it's only a little sin, go ahead, no one's watching."
He discredits God's character in our minds and tries to convince us that it's true - that God is not faithful, not all knowing, not all powerful.
Isolation is Satan's tactic. Cling to the Body.
Any disobedience to the known will of God - sin.
He accuses the brethren. Thats Satan's job.
I want to feel God at all times - like a little toddler that clings to His mother...
...He wants me to walk by faith, trusting that my sins have been forgiven,
regardless of if I feel Him or not.
Satan is the worst travel agent - all of his trips are full of guilt.
He will take you no where heavenbound.
"On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, ALL other ground is sinking sand, ALL other ground is sinking sand."
Regardless of the sin you have been trying to get out of or feel that
you cannot let go of - even after repentance -
LET Christ be your ROCK. CONSCIOUSLY GIVE IT TO HIM.
Give your will to Him.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
The Parable of the Lost Son...
Who are you? The prodigal son? The older brother? The father?
Jesus continued: "There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them.
"Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
"When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' So he got up and went to his father. "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'
"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
"Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'
"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' " (Luke 15:11-32)
Today has been a testing day. It's been hard. I have had a hard time forgiving someone and remembering who I am in Him. I read one of my other friend's blogs (Carol Hobbs) - and although she was talking about something different, the truth written there resonated with me and I was able to relate it back to my situation. Here it is:
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. . . to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved." Ephesians 1:3-6
I am accepted. I still don't know about the dreams. The desires. The plans. The future. But I am accepted. Jeremiah does quote God as saying, "I know the thoughts that I think toward you. . ." I surely don't know them, but God does. (Check out Jeremiah 29: 10-14 and note all the times God says, "I will. . . ".)
And so, I am comforted today knowing that God knows the thoughts He thinks toward me and to top it all off: I am accepted in the Beloved. That's my Jesus.
Here is the line I especially took courage from...
When all around my soul gives way, He then is all my hope and stay. On Christ, the solid rock I stand. . . all other ground is sinking sand."
I am a Handmaiden of the King. I am His Flower. I have been grafted in. I am His.
I hope you don't mind that I borrowed this, Carol!
Jesus continued: "There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them.
"Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
"When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' So he got up and went to his father. "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'
"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
"Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'
"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' " (Luke 15:11-32)
Today has been a testing day. It's been hard. I have had a hard time forgiving someone and remembering who I am in Him. I read one of my other friend's blogs (Carol Hobbs) - and although she was talking about something different, the truth written there resonated with me and I was able to relate it back to my situation. Here it is:
"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. . . to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved." Ephesians 1:3-6
I am accepted. I still don't know about the dreams. The desires. The plans. The future. But I am accepted. Jeremiah does quote God as saying, "I know the thoughts that I think toward you. . ." I surely don't know them, but God does. (Check out Jeremiah 29: 10-14 and note all the times God says, "I will. . . ".)
And so, I am comforted today knowing that God knows the thoughts He thinks toward me and to top it all off: I am accepted in the Beloved. That's my Jesus.
Here is the line I especially took courage from...
When all around my soul gives way, He then is all my hope and stay. On Christ, the solid rock I stand. . . all other ground is sinking sand."
I am a Handmaiden of the King. I am His Flower. I have been grafted in. I am His.
I hope you don't mind that I borrowed this, Carol!
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
GUESS WHAT!?!!
I just received an email from Dr. Bassett from ISC (after meeting with him),
and he said he would love to have me come and do my student teaching with them if they can find me a placement!!! Please help me in praising GOD!!!
WOO HOO!!!! YIPPIE!!!
I just received an email from Dr. Bassett from ISC (after meeting with him),
and he said he would love to have me come and do my student teaching with them if they can find me a placement!!! Please help me in praising GOD!!!
WOO HOO!!!! YIPPIE!!!
Now, I just have to wait a little while longer to see if I am officially accepted from our education department...
Yay! The adventure continues!
Friday, February 8, 2008
Beloved of Christ...
Today, God has thrilled me with His presence. I love the Body of Christ that surrounds me here at school. How amazing the God is that has brought such awesome brothers and sisters into my life. In edifying the Body through obedience, all for His Glory, we are encouraged and given strength to continue on in this world. Last night, at World Christian Fellowship, or more commonly called WCF, Bob Brock visited from VOM - Voice of the Martyrs - and shared God's vision for us as young people. How awesome God is. In the midst of uncertainty and a future left to be defined by the upcoming days of my life - I stand knowing that He is God and I am not - and all that is - is in His hands. Oh, that I might trust Him with every moment of my day.
God has been teaching me so much. As He continues to tend to the wounds of the past, healing is coming! What was once severed, defective, and damaged - He is restoring! Instead of having a ton of brokeness from the past and all that happened - I have scars - but no open wounds left for satan to pour salt on. Cover me with your hedge, Father! The other night I re-lived the past - the mistakes and hurt. It was about 2 a.m. and I layed in bed weeping. Everyone was sound asleep and there I layed - alone - or so the enemy was trying to convince me of. As I re-lived the hurt and questioned God, He stepped in. "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." (Isaiah 46:4) Praise God! He turned my thinking around! I could have fallen asleep hopeless and seemingly forsaken - but He stepped in and rescued me! He is petitioning on my behalf! He didn't stop with just comforting me and letting me cry out to Him. He began to pour healing waters on my heart once again and spoke - reminding me of who He is and who I am. I am His Flower that has been grafted back in - I am His gem! My heart is just flooded with Him. Praise God! He also gave me visions for the purity retreat that I will be speaking at in March. Pray for it! Pray that God would work wonders! Pray that He would speak through me and would help me to be obedient. Satan is raging war against my heart and mind - pray that God would give me scripture to build a wall around it.
He will not forsake you, dear friends!
God has been teaching me so much. As He continues to tend to the wounds of the past, healing is coming! What was once severed, defective, and damaged - He is restoring! Instead of having a ton of brokeness from the past and all that happened - I have scars - but no open wounds left for satan to pour salt on. Cover me with your hedge, Father! The other night I re-lived the past - the mistakes and hurt. It was about 2 a.m. and I layed in bed weeping. Everyone was sound asleep and there I layed - alone - or so the enemy was trying to convince me of. As I re-lived the hurt and questioned God, He stepped in. "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you." (Isaiah 46:4) Praise God! He turned my thinking around! I could have fallen asleep hopeless and seemingly forsaken - but He stepped in and rescued me! He is petitioning on my behalf! He didn't stop with just comforting me and letting me cry out to Him. He began to pour healing waters on my heart once again and spoke - reminding me of who He is and who I am. I am His Flower that has been grafted back in - I am His gem! My heart is just flooded with Him. Praise God! He also gave me visions for the purity retreat that I will be speaking at in March. Pray for it! Pray that God would work wonders! Pray that He would speak through me and would help me to be obedient. Satan is raging war against my heart and mind - pray that God would give me scripture to build a wall around it.
He will not forsake you, dear friends!
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Spiritual Warfare...
Our weapons are not of flesh, but of the Spirit.
God, I pray that you would strengthen me. So many times, I have went out onto the field and have been scared away by the enemy's gruling faces or have not have the strength to hold up my sword and stand firm in Your truth. Or, I fear to confess, given my surrender to the enemy. Forgive me, God! Please, make me a warrior who knows how to do battle. Prepare my feet for the trip, prepare my mind and heart, prepare my hands and eyes. Let me not be taken aback by hidden blows cast by the enemy in the midst of fog. Help me to have clarity. You are not a god of confusion, but a God of truth. War is happening now. In my heart. On this earth. With the body of Christ. Many a fatal blow have wounded Christ's bride. Help me to fight it, God.
God, I pray that you would strengthen me. So many times, I have went out onto the field and have been scared away by the enemy's gruling faces or have not have the strength to hold up my sword and stand firm in Your truth. Or, I fear to confess, given my surrender to the enemy. Forgive me, God! Please, make me a warrior who knows how to do battle. Prepare my feet for the trip, prepare my mind and heart, prepare my hands and eyes. Let me not be taken aback by hidden blows cast by the enemy in the midst of fog. Help me to have clarity. You are not a god of confusion, but a God of truth. War is happening now. In my heart. On this earth. With the body of Christ. Many a fatal blow have wounded Christ's bride. Help me to fight it, God.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
A glorious adventure...
This last week has been wonderful. Not only have I been so encouraged by people that God has placed in my life, but I have been basking in His presence - How Awesome that is!!!
My mind is kinda full right now...ahhh! I will update you all later!
Today's Fun Fact about China: Ice cream was invented in China around 2000BC
when the Chinese packed a soft milk and rice mixture in the snow. (http://www.tooter4kids.com/china/fun_facts_about_china.htm)
Yay!
My mind is kinda full right now...ahhh! I will update you all later!
Today's Fun Fact about China: Ice cream was invented in China around 2000BC
when the Chinese packed a soft milk and rice mixture in the snow. (http://www.tooter4kids.com/china/fun_facts_about_china.htm)
Yay!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
A sacrifice for testing...
So, I just want to let everyone out there know that God lives!! These last few days have stood the test and its been really neat to see God work. It has been through the course of quiet realizations of how the Lord is following through with His promises. WOw, is all I can say. So let me explain.
What you may or may not know about me is that I am studying to be a teacher, and I have been for the last few years - 4 in fact. I cannot believe it has been almost 4 years. Anyway, my freshman year, I began to feel a drawing towards China. At the time, I wasn't too concerned with it due to the fact that I hadn't fully figured out what I wanted to teach. As time progressed and the Lord worked out detail by detail - the tugging to teach in China remained steady as ever. This past fall, I applied to student teach in China, hoping that the Lord would confirm this drawing as His calling, not just a desire that I had. Coming back to school, I was excited and nervous to find out whether I had been accepted or not into the cross-cultural student teaching program. Finally, last week I received an email from our education secretary that there was to be a meeting in a week. I RSVPed back and tried to trust the Lord that I was doing what He wanted or that I would at least find out if this was to be God's will for me. Yesterday, I attended the meeting, where I was completely overwhelmed at the amount of responsibility, work, and funds that had to come through to make this possible. I knew it would be expensive and I knew that I would have to work hard - but at the meeting, I was floored at how much more is expected of the pre-service teachers who are hoping to student teach overseas. After leaving the meeting, I prayed that the Lord would speak to me and show me truth in the midst of this confusion and helplessness. As a young student who is putting herself through school, I did not see how this trip would be financially possible. I prayed and had my room mates surround me in prayer, and I layed in bed - tossing and turning - as to what I would do. While trying to conquer a cold and a headache - I wrestled with the answers. What if this wasn't God's will and this drawing was just a desire that I had conjured up myself? Finally, before I fell asleep, I reasoned that I would wait until after I graduated to apply to an international school in China, and I would perform my student teaching somewhere in the states. With this plan, I doubted if I would ever truly make it to China, but I felt an exhausted peace as I drifted off to sleep. I planned on calling my parents the following day - today - to tell them the news and my plans. HEre is the part I get excited about: My Dad was not worried at all. I read through some of the orientation material and explained all the details - and He said with confidence that God can do this! He said He would be praying for me and he reminded me of how faithful God has been in the past. As I went through the budget and specific needs, including a laptop and other things of the sort, we began to get a gameplan for the spring and the summer. This was confirmation to me that I might be able to do this. Last night, I felt that I had to give it up - to sacrifice it for now until I could do it later. Today, I felt like God gave it back to me - wrapped in confidence and hope - that this dream is not just a dream - but maybe a reality. My roommate reminded me of Abraham and Isaac - and I believe that God was testing my motives - to see if I would give up my dream to teach in China.
What you may or may not know about me is that I am studying to be a teacher, and I have been for the last few years - 4 in fact. I cannot believe it has been almost 4 years. Anyway, my freshman year, I began to feel a drawing towards China. At the time, I wasn't too concerned with it due to the fact that I hadn't fully figured out what I wanted to teach. As time progressed and the Lord worked out detail by detail - the tugging to teach in China remained steady as ever. This past fall, I applied to student teach in China, hoping that the Lord would confirm this drawing as His calling, not just a desire that I had. Coming back to school, I was excited and nervous to find out whether I had been accepted or not into the cross-cultural student teaching program. Finally, last week I received an email from our education secretary that there was to be a meeting in a week. I RSVPed back and tried to trust the Lord that I was doing what He wanted or that I would at least find out if this was to be God's will for me. Yesterday, I attended the meeting, where I was completely overwhelmed at the amount of responsibility, work, and funds that had to come through to make this possible. I knew it would be expensive and I knew that I would have to work hard - but at the meeting, I was floored at how much more is expected of the pre-service teachers who are hoping to student teach overseas. After leaving the meeting, I prayed that the Lord would speak to me and show me truth in the midst of this confusion and helplessness. As a young student who is putting herself through school, I did not see how this trip would be financially possible. I prayed and had my room mates surround me in prayer, and I layed in bed - tossing and turning - as to what I would do. While trying to conquer a cold and a headache - I wrestled with the answers. What if this wasn't God's will and this drawing was just a desire that I had conjured up myself? Finally, before I fell asleep, I reasoned that I would wait until after I graduated to apply to an international school in China, and I would perform my student teaching somewhere in the states. With this plan, I doubted if I would ever truly make it to China, but I felt an exhausted peace as I drifted off to sleep. I planned on calling my parents the following day - today - to tell them the news and my plans. HEre is the part I get excited about: My Dad was not worried at all. I read through some of the orientation material and explained all the details - and He said with confidence that God can do this! He said He would be praying for me and he reminded me of how faithful God has been in the past. As I went through the budget and specific needs, including a laptop and other things of the sort, we began to get a gameplan for the spring and the summer. This was confirmation to me that I might be able to do this. Last night, I felt that I had to give it up - to sacrifice it for now until I could do it later. Today, I felt like God gave it back to me - wrapped in confidence and hope - that this dream is not just a dream - but maybe a reality. My roommate reminded me of Abraham and Isaac - and I believe that God was testing my motives - to see if I would give up my dream to teach in China.
I still do not know what will happen - if I will go or not - although things are looking up. There are quite a few hurdles I will have to jump first. However, I will trust in the Lord.
Along with the Lord's help, I will pursue what the world would think crazy. By His grace and provision, one year from now, I will be preparing to go to China.
Please pray that through this journey, the Lord would provide not only physical needs, but spiritual wisdom and guidance.
My God is good.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Shiny, Brand New...
Yay for 2008! We made it through another entire year!
It is so great that we can start fresh - with new goals and dreams in mind.
Here is my New Year's Resolution:
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
(Colossians 3:12-17)
I pray that this year would be wonderful for you.
Remember to give the Spirit control - it is an act of will!
Blessings to you!
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